Redis and varnish, ubuntu 22.04, magento 2.4.3

Description

the server cache load is going up and down
I had a go at the server one week ago and it was a lot of work
I hav attached memory diagram and I have also had a go at the redis config but it is simply not getting to work, it is having issues on port 6179 and I cannot make it work.
I need experienced hands to assist. likely a small issue
but configuring varnish and redis and cahce to not flood the ram and make the site slow and dead.
it was lastr week using 58Gb of rfam so this has now become more manageable, but still the peaks in the diagram is making the server slow.